If evangelical churches were not doctrinally weak and watered down, their church names would reflect traditional conventions. Anyone who doesn’t see this is blind to what is going on.
I’m going back there to plant a Baptist church and name it Devils Backbone Baptist Church … and I can’t wait to see the eyes of attendees at the GARBC conference when the church is accepted into the association.
I realize this is satire, but a few years ago I put together a game for a church fellowship, where I mixed together names of actual churches, names of music groups and titles of Christian Living books. The point was all three genres search for pithy, catchy names that will increase the bottom line.
Here is the list of actual churches I found:
Run for your Life Angels on Fire Healing has Begun By Fire By Fire Jehovah Sharp Sharp Satan in Trouble High Tension Chukwudi & Son Power Pass Power Guided Missiles Go and Tell Ahab that Elijah is Here Trigger Happy El-Shaddai Must not Die Givers Never Lack Fist of Fury The Yoke Must Broke The House
You can see how these could double for a music group name, or the title of a Christian Living book. I could post those lists too if anyone is interested.
My run-away favorite is “Go and Tell Ahab that Elijah is Here”
I realize this is satire, but a few years ago I put together a game for a church fellowship, where I mixed together names of actual churches, names of music groups and titles of Christian Living books. The point was all three genres search for pithy, catchy names that will increase the bottom line.
Here is the list of actual churches I found:
Run for your Life Angels on Fire Healing has Begun By Fire By Fire Jehovah Sharp Sharp Satan in Trouble High Tension Chukwudi & Son Power Pass Power Guided Missiles Go and Tell Ahab that Elijah is Here Trigger Happy El-Shaddai Must not Die Givers Never Lack Fist of Fury The Yoke Must Broke The House
You can see how these could double for a music group name, or the title of a Christian Living book. I could post those lists too if anyone is interested.
My run-away favorite is “Go and Tell Ahab that Elijah is Here”
You are making the case for … “Let’s just name it ‘First Baptist Church’”
I’m going back there to plant a Baptist church and name it Devils Backbone Baptist Church … and I can’t wait to see the eyes of attendees at the GARBC conference when the church is accepted into the association.
My grandmother grew up near an area known as Gin Ridge. Sadly, her childhood Baptist church was not named after the locality. :^)
Not to change the subject, but I have been pondering the concept of “church planting” ever since an article was linked to here recently about “Why Jesus Never Commanded Us to Plant Churches.” God really didn’t command us to go somewhere and open a church, he commanded us to make disciples. When there are Christians who have not yet been organized into an assembly that has overseers and deacons, located in an area where no such organization already exists, then a church is a natural outworking of the process of making disciples.
Where I live, I have seen several church plants in the past several years - and I still don’t know why. There are already many churches well within driving distance that stand on the absolutes (dare I say the word “fundamentals?”), so why do we need more? Could it be just another example of Americanism, where we want just that perfect flavor, where we want to have it our way?
Ashamed of Jesus! of that Friend On whom for heaven my hopes depend! It must not be! be this my shame, That I no more revere His name. -Joseph Grigg (1720-1768)
I remember, when my family moved to Minnesota, visiting a church on the south side of the Minnesota River and having a hearty laugh when the pastor said “we decided not to call ourselves Savage Baptist Church for obvious reasons.”
Appreciate JNoel’s comment as well…certainly “I want it my way” is part of the plethora of church buildings in many towns no longer used as such.
Run for your Life Angels on Fire Healing has Begun By Fire By Fire Jehovah Sharp Sharp Satan in Trouble High Tension Chukwudi & Son Power Pass Power Guided Missiles Go and Tell Ahab that Elijah is Here Trigger Happy El-Shaddai Must not Die Givers Never Lack Fist of Fury The Yoke Must Broke The House
You can see how these could double for a music group name, or the title of a Christian Living book. I could post those lists too if anyone is interested.
My run-away favorite is “Go and Tell Ahab that Elijah is Here”
My favorite was a church in my own ministry sphere named: A.C.T.S.— Anointed Christians Terrorizing Satan
Discussion
New2 comments:
2 comments:
Twitter
Jim's Doctrinal Statement
NewGreek
They should just start using Greek words in their church names - that’ll get them a few years worth of good names:
Tyler is a pastor in Olympia, WA and works in State government.
NewProof of evangelical apostasy.
If evangelical churches were not doctrinally weak and watered down, their church names would reflect traditional conventions. Anyone who doesn’t see this is blind to what is going on.
John B. Lee
NewChurch name of the century
This is where I grew up (Delhi OH)
I’m going back there to plant a Baptist church and name it Devils Backbone Baptist Church … and I can’t wait to see the eyes of attendees at the GARBC conference when the church is accepted into the association.
Twitter
Jim's Doctrinal Statement
Newsatire
I realize this is satire, but a few years ago I put together a game for a church fellowship, where I mixed together names of actual churches, names of music groups and titles of Christian Living books. The point was all three genres search for pithy, catchy names that will increase the bottom line.
Here is the list of actual churches I found:
Run for your Life
Angels on Fire
Healing has Begun
By Fire By Fire
Jehovah Sharp Sharp
Satan in Trouble
High Tension
Chukwudi & Son
Power Pass Power
Guided Missiles
Go and Tell Ahab that Elijah is Here
Trigger Happy
El-Shaddai Must not Die
Givers Never Lack
Fist of Fury
The Yoke Must Broke
The House
You can see how these could double for a music group name, or the title of a Christian Living book. I could post those lists too if anyone is interested.
My run-away favorite is “Go and Tell Ahab that Elijah is Here”
NewYou are making the case for ...
You are making the case for … “Let’s just name it ‘First Baptist Church’”
Twitter
Jim's Doctrinal Statement
NewMore fun.
My grandmother grew up near an area known as Gin Ridge. Sadly, her childhood Baptist church was not named after the locality. :^)
Aspiring to be a stick in the mud.
NewUnfortunate Names
I recall a Beth Aven (not Haven) Baptist Church but one of the most unfortunate one I’ve seen is Battlefield Baptist Church.
"Some things are of that nature as to make one's fancy chuckle, while his heart doth ache." John Bunyan
NewBeecher Bible and Rifle Church
Has anyone heard of Beecher Bible and Rifle Church? It was from the Kansas Territory “Bleeding Kansas” days.
NewYou ought to see the names of
You ought to see the names of some churches in Haiti!
NewPlanting Christians?
Where I live, I have seen several church plants in the past several years - and I still don’t know why. There are already many churches well within driving distance that stand on the absolutes (dare I say the word “fundamentals?”), so why do we need more? Could it be just another example of Americanism, where we want just that perfect flavor, where we want to have it our way?
Ashamed of Jesus! of that Friend On whom for heaven my hopes depend! It must not be! be this my shame, That I no more revere His name. -Joseph Grigg (1720-1768)
NewAppreciated, and....
I remember, when my family moved to Minnesota, visiting a church on the south side of the Minnesota River and having a hearty laugh when the pastor said “we decided not to call ourselves Savage Baptist Church for obvious reasons.”
Appreciate JNoel’s comment as well…certainly “I want it my way” is part of the plethora of church buildings in many towns no longer used as such.
Aspiring to be a stick in the mud.
NewDarrell Post wrote:
My favorite was a church in my own ministry sphere named: A.C.T.S.— Anointed Christians Terrorizing Satan
My second favorite was Foot of Ten Bible Church
Lee
NewIn spite of my respect for
In spite of my respect for its history, I have always thought that “Wealthy Park Baptist Church” was very sadly named.
NewLee
Behold, the Foot of Ten Independent Baptist Church explains it’s bizarre name …
Tyler is a pastor in Olympia, WA and works in State government.